These Calendars Are Horrendous
By Christine Lewis, PWCG Founder
Take a look at these calendar theme ideas, and either laugh or cry. You know, they could be a thing, or not. Or you could buy one of PWCG’s calendars.
1) Adorable Dogs That Bite Toddlers – – He’s cute, but he despises the competition.
2) Cute Cats…That’ll Kill You in Your Sleep
Ever notice how a cat often looks like he’s staring into your soul? This one’s eyes look like they could glow in the dark, or kill you by shooting out laser beams with his stare. He might watch you while you’re sleeping. Yeah. There’s nothing creepy about that at all.
3) Grandmas Who DON’T Spoil Their Grandchildren
She’s NOT going to bake you cookies. She might take you shopping…to buy clothes SHE likes that’ll make you look like a mini-HER. Every little thing you do embarrasses her. She didn’t even want to be a grandma. She thinks it makes her look old (ummm, no Grandmaree you look old because you’re bitter). Yeah, it want to see this every day when I want to make sure I’m not forgetting anything I need to do today. Add to calendar: take my self-esteem down a notch.
4) Just Give Me The Mondays (Said NO ONE, EVER!!!)
Okay. Maybe this calendar is for very driven people who love to CONQUER Mondays. A majority of us just want to get through our Mondays. Can we NOT focus just on Mondays please? Wow! This calendar’s already stained with coffee, ink, and strawberries from that waffle I ate for breakfast. I wonder how the rest of my day will go? At least I had a yummy breakfast (on the go). YES, I know they’re watercolor stains. Just having a little fun.
5) People You Think You Know Until They Turn Around
Oh. I LOVE this one. I really want to look at pictures of the back of people’s heads. I really want to be reminded of all of the awkward social moments when I’ve been at the grocery store, or in a huge crowd, and I’ve tapped on someone’s back to say hello, or worse, given them a HUGE hug. They turn around and …”Yeah. Sorry about that. I’m just that totally random stranger that loves tapping on people’s backs and giving hugs you don’t see coming from people you don’t know from Adam. Carry on.
6) People You Think Are Waving at YOU
Probably one of the only awkward social situations worse than saying hi to the back of a stranger’s head is waving back to someone you think is waving at you…and then running a hand through your hair when you realize they’re saying hello to the person behind you. Granted, this guy looks like he’d be one of those people you’d feel comfortable making that mistake with. Who knows? You might make a new friend!
7) People You Think Are Talking to YOU
Okay. Here’s another calendar theme I don’t want reminded of everyday: having a conversation with someone I think is talking to me, to find out they’re on their headset. Ever been in a bathroom stall. You hear someone who sounds like they’re talking to you. So you awkwardly add to the conversation. Then you leave the stall to wash your hands. They leave the stall to wash their hands, and you notice they were on their headset the whole time. Whoever took this picture did make a cool image. It’s all gold. How in the world does he see out of his glasses? Wait. Maybe I was talking to a statue all this time. Then where did the voice come from? Hmmm. It appears I have OTHER issues.
All Joking Aside
Okay. I’ll be very transparent here. The reason I wrote this blog was to be pretty much straight forward. I have calendars to sell, so I can keep my mission alive to provide hope to the newly diagnosed and restore confidence in breast cancer survivors. You see, when you buy one of our calendars you’re helping us to either recoup the money we invested in the last photo shoot or to have money to go toward the next one. We can’t keep funding these shoots without the mission funding itself. So there are two options available:
1) Buy one of the products below (where we at least get some affiliate money back) OR
2) Buy a PWCG calendar OR
3) Ok. There’s actually one more option. You could also enroll in one of our courses to help you either navigate yourself through breast cancer treatment or optimize your “new normal”. When you join you have access to our premium content library from a month to a year. If this calendar mission takes off we might add a lifetime membership (but for now we’re trying to play it a little safe).
You Can Buy One of These Products OR Buy a PWCG Calendar
1) Awkward Family Photos
If you’ve ever watched Ellen you know awkward family photos are a thing, but did you know they made them into a calendar?
2) Awkward Family Photo Caption Game
If you make awkward family photos into a calendar theme then you know it won’t just be left there. How about the Awkward Family Photo Caption Game? This could be fun!
3) Awkward Family Photo Coloring Book?
Did you see that coming? Really? An Awkward Family Photo Coloring Book? This is strange, yet funny. Hey. I think I have one of those elephant gift exchanges coming up. I think I need to buy this.
4) Awkward Pet Photos
If you have awkward family photos you naturally have to have awkward family PET photos. You knew this was coming right?
5) Dog Shaming Calendar
If you have awkward family pet photo calendars, then naturally the pet shaming ones are in there too. This one’s the dog shaming calendar.
6) Dog Shaming Coloring Book
No they didn’t. Yes they did. They have a dog shaming coloring book. Ha! Ha!
7) Farting Animals Adult Coloring Book
I like to have odd numbers of things listed, and I just kept coming across the strangest but funniest products. I’m not sure if this is an adult coloring book because of the complexity, the content, or a little bit of both. Apparently adults haven’t really grown up yet (but hey, we don’t need to go in the completely opposite direction and be so full of ourselves that we never have fun).
So which one of these are YOU going to buy? Comment below.
When I was diagnosed with Invasive Ductal Carcinoma in 2015 I wanted my journey with breast cancer to have a purpose. First and foremost, my family was my motivation to fight this disease. I made a lot of lifestyle changes so that I can be around for my family for many years to come, but I also felt inspired to archive my journey so that others could benefit from what I’ve learned and applied.This was why Pink Warrior Calendar Girls was founded.